The Shadow Queen's Diary
by Bela Vosa
Summary: Yama has been having dreams about a certain dragon-wielding billionaire. Little does she know that she is the heir to shadow magic and all the darkness that comes with it... Can she find a balance with the help of an unbeliever like Seto Kaiba? R Rplease


**This is based off of one of my old stories, though it's a lot more elaborate. I didn't do a lot of editing, mostly because my other stories are all about editing right now, but also because I wanted Yama's emotions to flow freely. She's lost her parents, her home, and her basic human right of interaction, which makes her vulnerable.  
However, she is still the spiritual daughter of a pharoah, after all. This chapter is long because it sets up the action about to begin as Yama Keimaru falls into the mystical world of shadow magic.**

**NOTES: It's more polite to call someone by their last names, so they're used a lot in this story, at least for now. Also, there's more Japanese mannerisms then in the anime, like bowing and offering each other cards. They're mimicking the behavior that they'll need as adults, kind of like animals in the wild. Yuugi-tachi have grown up a little but Atem's departure is still a little close to Yuugi. He's drawn towards Yama in a subconcious attempt to remember him.**

**NEXT CHAPTER: Think about this with me: If Yama's having dreams of Seto Kaiba, what is Seto Kaiba dreaming of?**

**New Monsters:  
****Prime Material Dragon**  
**Card-Type: **Effect Monster  
**Attribute: **Light | **Level: **6  
**Type: **Dragon  
**ATK: **2400 | **DEF: **2000  
**Description: **Any effect that would inflict damage to a player increases their Life Points by the same amount, instead. During either player's turn, when a Spell, Trap, Spell/Trap effect, or Effect Monster's effect is activated that would destroy a monster(s) on the field: You can send 1 card from your hand to the Graveyard; negate the activation and destroy it.

* * *

**CHAPTER ONE: DIARY  
**

**july 18**

I woke up from a bad dream... almost as terrible as reality. In it, I had been Seto-nii, or Mokuba, or both at the same time, I can't really remember. It was a vision of the past, and it made me cry. I don't really want to talk about it.

I suppose eventually I'll have to come clean with the fact that I dream about the Kaiba Corp CEO, and that I call him Seto-nii on accident all the time, but until the day we meet, I can treasure it for myself.

I think I love him. Not love him love him, grossness, but like he's already spending every day with me, taking me to the park and letting me lean my head on his shoulder as I read under the cherry trees. That's why I keep going by myself... I've seen him on TV, and dueling magazines and business magazines and every time I say "congratulations," under my breath. I wonder if he dreams of me too? I mean, he probably isn't psychic, but maybe my energy overflowed into his soul just a little. So that he could get some of my happy memories.

Memories from before, I mean. At least the real Seto-nii had a brother, Mokuba, during his troubles. But I'm all alone.

Except for my dreams. I wish I could tell him in real life, how much it hurts to be alone in this big giant orphanage, waiting for the trust fund to kick in, firing my lawyer after he tried to cheat me, so that I'm left doing everything by myself. Having enough money to get to adulthood stored away, and wearing four-year-old shoes and hand-me-downs. Fighting with the others because I'm so strange, and not finishing school because I'm so far behind.

I wish I could tell him about the darkness that consumed my father, and the man who stole our small but fruitful business away from him, and the way that they had died.

If I told him that my father killed my mother out of sheer drunken stupidness, would he take care of me? Would he understand why I can't get into a car without feeling blood on my hands or pain in my head?

Of course not, cause he's not real! He's just a dream. A dream that makes me cry in the morning, love in the afternoon, and go to bed early, just to see him again. To see him up late at night, staring at a computer screen, to see him care for Mokuba (and pretend it was me). I wish I had a brother like that...

At fifteen, I suppose it's stupid to have such an unreal desire. My therapist knows nothing of him, but I try to go around the fact and talk about it, and he says that I just want someone to take care of me, and that's why I like him. Basically, without knowing that I'm psychic, that's all he can say.

But in reality, who's going to adopt someone my age? I'll end up in the foster system soon.

I just want to go back to school at least. Even though I never passed the last grade. Everyone says take your time, and heal, but I hate being still and alone. I want friends, and real people, not sad children waiting for loneliness to consume them. At least I can study on my own... I think I might get to skip a grade with the amount I read and soak in, plus the fact that I've absorbed some of Seto-nii's business savvy from being him every night.

I think I might even test out and go to college. They can't keep me from there, as long as I can pay for it. All the social workers and therapists who say I'm not ready, I guess I want to fight them. It's a real feeling I haven't had for months. But summer's almost over, and the time for grief is passing. Or at least I guess it is. I still have all this madness and pain inside, but it's not as real as my need to move forward.

Maybe I'll be so cool, Seto-nii will come and seek me out.

**july 22**

I'm supposed to keep a diary every day. What's the point if no one sees it, I don't know, it just makes me sad to think about things all over again. Today I just took you to my secret spot in the park, a dark grove with dappled sunlight and green leaves.

And cherries. Not that I could eat them probably, since they grow in a park, but it's cool to look up and see them. So you know, Seto-nii is a good magazine today, actually one published by Toudai. It's weird since he never went to college. But they talk about the fun stuff, Kaibaland (gosh I want to go there), duel disk improvements, his relationship with his workers, and avoid that topic.

It was a nice change to go to a newsstand for a magazine instead of the supermarket, even though it cost a little more. The reason I didn't write was actually because I had to go look for a new lawyer, according to my social worker. But he did give me a little money, and I used it for magazines instead of clothes. I need new shoes though.

The lawyer I saw was ugly and stupid. I wonder if I should go to one of Seto-nii's lawyers, I know some of them by face now. But then I'd be asked how I found them, and I can't say "since my parents died I've been dreaming that I was your boss or his little brother."

Five months tomorrow. And so. and so and so and so what do they want me to say about it? I hate talking to them, you know. Hate it. Hate the little kids running around that place, hate sharing my room with three others, hate that boy that steals stuff. He found my collection of magazines and internet stories printed out from the library and thinks I'm a stalker freak.

Maybe I am.

This park, after all, looks up at Kaiba Corp's headquarters. I like long sweeping coats and dark brooding hairstyles. I even started collecting duel monster cards, one booster pack at a time, since I can never afford a full deck of choice cards. I really really wish I could have a Blues Eyes White Dragon...

Yeah, I'm a stalker. But today's a good day, except for stupid grownups. So I'll let it go.

**july 23**

Yesterday I met Yuugi Motou. Sort of. On the way home from the park. I knew from magazines that he was Seto-nii's rival when Niisama (as Mokuba calls him) used to duel.

But still, oh my gosh, I can't say that I was, well, as much on Seto-nii's side as I thought I would be. It was impossible to hold a fierce rival pride like that when Yuugi-nii (he told me to call him Yuugi!) is so awesome and cool.

I dropped you in the mud. Don't be mad, you're clean now, but it was Yuugi-nii who picked you up. He's the same height as me, maybe even shorter (its so cool), and his hairstyle was so cool. Anyway, gosh, how can I gush over the competition! At least this proves that I'm not as influenced by Seto-nii as I thought (though I did think for a moment that if we got to know each other that I might meet him...). Yuugi wiped you off with his sleeve and gave you back with a bow.

"Is that Blue Eyes White Dragon?" he asked about the cover, after introducing himself and us bowing to each other (so polite). "You're a good artist."

"Thanks," I said, "he's my favorite I guess." I wished I had a card to give him, like a business meeting. "Though I can't have him because someone else has all the copies of the cards." I had to add that. It was like a secret joke.

"I like Dark Magician. Do you play Duel Monsters?" I blushed, not sure how to put it.

"I don't have a full deck, though I do have some cards." He made me very aware in that moment that I was really poor after all. "I can't get the ones I want, so I'm just saving up for them right now." How do I have that conversation?

"Well, my grandfather runs a game shop, if you can't find the ones you want." And then he did give me a card. "I'm sure he'll be happy to help you find the ones you like. Except for Blue Eyes White Dragon of course. Ah, here. I got this from a promotion, but it doesn't fit in my deck. Let me apologize for bumping into you."

"No, it's alright really," I forced out, but I wanted to touch something of Seto-nii's world, so I was hoping he'd give it to me anyway.

"It's no problem." He took an envelope out of his jacket pocket and shook out a card. "It's nice to meet a fellow player." He gave me the card and then looked at his watch. "Well, I was supposed to meet someone a few minutes ago, so maybe I'll see you in the neighborhood again, Keimaru-san."

All I could say was "Yes," as he walked away. The card was Prime Material Dragon.

There's no way he couldn't use such a good card! But he gave it to me anyway. I think I might just understand why he's your rival, Seto-nii. He's just as amazing as you are, and just as loving (though you'll never admit to it).

But still, a dragon. A dragon! Six star dragon! With a special effect! Such a good card, I'll have to hide it to keep it safe from the kids.

**july24**

Today really sucks. Nothing good is gonna come of this. But I have that box under my matress, with over five thousand yen in it in change, and so I'm gonna go. And get a card from Yuugi Motou's grandfather.

Wow, what a crazy thought. I have to write down that I'm doing it in order to make myself do it.

So go do it already.

**july24**

I did it. And there was this really cute boy there, though I didn't talk to him cause he was definitely older than me. But it was like icing on the cake, and he looked like he knew Yuugi's grandfather. Maybe I should have told them that I had met Yuugi-nii-san on the street, but I didn't want to be too much of a fan-girl. So I just walked around, stared with envy and drool at the new duel disks, and actually, I think I have enough cards for a full deck now. And a game board that Motou-san gave me for free for spending all my money. I think that my good mood was just infectious.

Maybe tonight I'll dream my own dream, of cute boys and duel monsters, instead of Seto-nii. It wouldn't be so bad for a change. It's so awesome to unfold the board and set out my monsters, traps, my deck, my discards, each with a clearly labeled section for new players. And I got to use the internet at the orphanage and the printer, and I printed out information for strategies. My deck, haphazard as it is, is going to need a lot of thought before I can even play the kids who gather in the rec room and play each other.

**july25**

I can't believe I forgot. I guess with meeting Yuugi Motou, trying to get a lawyer, dealing with life, just everything, I forgot.

My birthday's in, like, well it's Risshu. August 7th. There's even gonna be a festival, Tanabata. The star festival is usually held in July in Domino, so seeing that flier was just so lucky. I'll have to make a streamer for Orihime...

While I was staring at the flier I saw the cute boy again. I wonder why he was in the park by himself. Probably just walking home. School's going to start soon, I wonder if he's graduated yet.

The story behind Tanabata is that they only get to see each other one day a year. If I make a thousand paper cranes, will I get a glimpse of Seto-nii?

I'm not sure I should write this down. This next part. It might be dangerous if someone steals my diary and thinks I'm crazy enough already.

But Prime Material Dragon is sitting on my desk right now, hazy and lazy. And I'm the only one who can see him. I know cause I share the room with three other girls who are all here right now talking about Ryuchiro, who's getting adopted and is very cute apparently. I never pay attention to anyone, talking to them is too hard, so luckily they don't talk to me and I can just stare at this little gold creature for the rest of the night.

And question my sanity. Though I suppose its only a small step from psychic dreams to seeing things in real life.

**july26**

I told my social worker today: "If I had a lawyer he would just steal my money anyway." even though that's not what I want. I want my father's company back. In five years when I reach maturity, I can get it myself. That's what Seto-nii did after all, though he was able to use the people around him.

Stupid people. Trying to do what's best for me, they've left me in the dark as to how the whole thing's going. Like I'm not smart enough to know what money is. I even know down to the yen how much money should be left in the insurance fund, if the government didn't take anything except for my allowance like they were supposed to. And I know my trust fund to the t, all the rules and conditions, and I should be able to have it now. But they say I'm still too depressed to take care of myself. If they don't let me go to school and only give me an hour a day out on my own, how am I supposed to show them anything? I mean, doing chores and stuff only gets you so far. Maybe it's cause I don't talk to the other kids. I mean, I told the therapists why. And I don't even have scars from the accident, even though I got all cut up. All the obvious wounds are gone, and I'm just angry. How can they keep me from living on my own because I'm angry.

I'm not that upset, despite the above rant. That's because I know cute boy's name... and it's Katsuya Jounoichi, and he does know Yuugi Motou, and in fact they're friends. I met him when I ran away to the park today, after seeing my worker. I was going to read, but I wanted to be in control so much that I just went up to him and said hi. He recognized me from the shop, which was rather flattering.

"So, you're the one that Yuugi met before." he said after we sat down on a bench together.

"Huh?" I responded.

"Your journal, it has Blue Eyes on it," he pointed at my lap.

"Oh, you mean when I met Yuugi-san before? Do you know each other then?"

He grinned at me. "Yeah, we're best friends. He was pretty impressed by your artwork. You should have told us it was you in the game shop, Grandpa would have given you a discount."

"Grandpa?"

"Yeah, he's Yug's grandfather but everyone calls him Grandpa anyway."

"I think I'll stick with Motou-san for now," I said precociously and grinned back.

"You're way too polite for your own good, Keimaru. You're one of us now."

"One of us?"

"One of Yuugi's friends, I guess. He'll be so mad that you didn't say hi to him before, he was looking forward to it."

"Really?" I blushed like crazy. Only twenty paper cranes and I had friends? A little spooky. But heck, maybe it'd show them that I'm not depressed like they think. "Well, I'd like to hang out with you guys I guess. I mean, I don't have any more money until I get my allowance again," I reminded myself.

"That's fine, I never have money either! At least you use yours on something useful. We could meet here tomorrow and just hang out." Katsuya-san was way too cool. I guess famous people are surrounded by cool people though.

"Sure, same time, I guess, since I have to do something in the morning?" I looked at my watch, and I was almost late (I made it though) to go back before dinner.

"Sure, nice to meet you." Katsuya stood up and offered me his hand. His super big and strong handsome hand. Don't look at me like that. He was so super cute, you know it. I had to supress the urge to giggle as I took it and stood up even, I'm such an otaku.

So now I have plans tomorrow, and I might stay out late just because I can, screw the government. I'm an anarchist!

Long live DUEL MONSTERS!

**july27**

Today's Friday, nothing special bout it. Nope nothing at all.

Really, want me to tell you? Really, really really?

Okay, it was awesome! And I got in so much trouble when I got home. But that's getting ahead of the story.

I met Katsuya-san at that same bench from yesterday, and I wore my favorite shirt, which had a dragon on it of course. Not a duel monsters dragon, but a big purple chinese dragon on a lighter purple tee. It looks like the dragon is melting into the shirt, it's so cool, plus it's the one thing that's really mine. Everything else was my parents', since I'm a minor, and it went to the bank to pay off our fake debts. But I got my clothes, my stuffed animals, my books, and all sorts of things in a storage facility waiting for me to get an apartment someday. Anyway, enough about the sad stuff, or I'll depress myself.

Katsuya-san was wearing a brown leather jacket and blue jeans. I felt a little overdressed, but then again he didn't know that it was my best shirt and favorite black skirt that I was wearing. His face lit up when he saw me.

"Hey, Keimaru," he called as he stood up.

"Am I late? We didn't set a time up."

"No, I just got here, and no one else has made it yet. Don't worry so much," he added, noticing my nervousness. "You'll get wrinkles."

I blushed. He doesn't know that I think he's cute, I have to remember. "So, um, Katsuya-san, what are your friends' names?" I said for something to do while we waited.

"Hey, Joui!" We turned to see a girl coming towards us. "Am I the first?"

"Yeah, Anzu," Katsuya took my hand and pulled us pass a walking couple. "Come on, meet Yama. Keimaru, this is Anzu."

"Joui," Anzu narrowed her eyes. "You're doing it again."

"Doing what?"

"Being dense." She pulled our hands apart. "When are you going to learn how to treat a lady? Come on, Yama-chan, let's go find Yuugi and Honda." She pulled me away.

"Thanks," I whispered.

"Sorry, he doesn't know any better." She chuckled at the look on his face before he followed us. "Everyone's waiting by the snack bar. Yuugi wants to buy you ice cream." I blushed again. "He doesn't know any better either. Those two are never gonna get girlfriends." She blushed when she said it and we spent a soft moment thinking about boys.

"Hey, Anzu! Keimaru-san!" Yuugi waved us over. "What flavor do you want?"

"Strawberry," I whispered to Anzu, and she nodded.

"Strawberry for both of us!" she shouted as we took a seat with another guy, who must have been Honda. "Hey, this is Yama Keimaru. Yama-chan, this is Hiroto Honda."

"Nice to meet you," I said, bowing my head as I sat down. "Though I'm not sure while I'm here, I'm glad to meet you guys."

"If Yug likes you, that's a good enough reason," Katsuya-san said as he handed me and Anzu our cones. He took the seat between me and Honda while Yuugi Motou sat next to Anzu.

"Pistachio?" I asked with wonder.

"What?" I had confused him again.

"You don't seem sophisticated enough for Pistachio," Anzu teased him as I stammered on about nothing.

"That's not what I meant..." But it was. He was kind of cool and everything, but he seemed rough around the edges.

"How old are you, Yama-chan?" Anzu asked.

"I'm fifteen, but it's almost my birthday."

"You're three years younger than us then." Anzu figured.

"And still taller than Yuugi," Honda-san added. I tried to say no again, but Motou-san just smiled at the jest.

"Did you bring your deck, Keimaru-san?" He asked and I handed it over, staring at my icecream. I focused on eating it while he shuffled through the cards. "You have a lot of dragon cards," he noticed. "Just like Joui and Kaiba."

The name would have brought me to my knees if I hadn't been sitting. I blushed even more, but they must have just taken it as some sort of fan-ness that comes from Yuugi Motou analyzing your deck, cause Anzu chuckled and Katsuya-san clapped me on the back.

"Come on Keimaru, he's just another guy. A short guy who works in a game store."

"Joui!" Yuugi rolled his eyes. "Come on yourself. Here," he gave me my cards back. "Where's Prime Material Dragon though?"

Not wanting to disappoint him, I pulled the card out my pants pocket. As soon as it was out of my hand and on the table, the little creature appeared. I looked away from him pointedly, but everyone else was staring at the table. They could see him? "Wait, you guys can see him?" I asked.

"Yeah, this is so cool," Yuugi stood up and took the card from the table. "I thought I sensed shadow magic, but I had no idea you could use it." He took another card from the deck on his belt. "I summon Dark Magician!" With a swirl of invisible energy, a minuature replica of the monster appeared on the table next to Prime Material Dragon. "Can you see him?"

I nodded mutely, struck dumb by the sheer exoticism of the situation. "What's going on?" I said after a second of everyone staring at me.

"You're a magic user!" Yuugi was practically hopping up and down in place with his excitement.

"Calm down Yug, you're freaking her out!" Katsuya insisted. "Ain't it enough that she has to deal with all this without your bouncing?"

Yuugi sat down again, blushing. "Sorry, I guess we'll have to explain now, huh?"

So they did. I'm not sure I should write it down, it kind of seems well unsanctimonious? Is that the right word? Is it even a word? Anyway, I stayed out late because we went to Burger World. Yuugi paid for my dinner, and everyone said that we should be on a first name basis now... and they're gonna teach me to duel and stuff.

I'm cutting it short because I've filled like four pages and it's getting close to curfew. But I can't wait until tomorrow. Even if this pesky dragon keeps following me around.


End file.
